the return of the Mimi

Hello. I am back. That is not to say that Philip won’t write anymore, since his series of movie reviews are entertaining. These past couple of months have been rather eventful as you know and there were many firsts as parents. Let's see…

First meeting with grandparents: You become family with your spouse when you get married. You inherit each other’s families and you are legally responsible for your mate. When you have a child together, you have created a person who truly belongs to both families. Our daughter is ours, but she is also a granddaughter to our parents. All pretty obvious, but pretty amazing when it happens to you. You also realize that your kid doesn’t really “belong” to you. She is there for the world to share. This was particularly reinforced when we went to take a family portrait.

I would totally buy insurance from these people.

Since becoming a mother, I have become especially aware of my mortality. We have given life to someone who is part us, who is (hopefully) going to outlive us. This is a very powerful feeling. It made me realize that I am a part of a chain of life. Again, pretty obvious stuff, but still.

First directing since becoming a mom: I survived. I directed Once Upon A Mattress at my theatre – the last of the three summer stock productions.

This was a good way to get back into directing since it was only a three-week commitment (though a very intense three weeks). I would go to work with Yuki at around 3:30 for rehearsals that began at 4:00 from Monday to Thursday. Philip would take a bus and meet us at the theatre around 5:30, eat dinner with us during the break and then take Yuki home. I would continue rehearsing until 9:30 and get a ride home from our generous stage manager, Meggan. On two Fridays where I had afternoon rehearsals Philip worked from home. Every day, I would put Yuki down for a nap from about 12:00 to 2:00 – though sometimes it was from 1:00 to 3:00, or 2:00 to 3:00 – cook dinner, and pack the car with my bag, Yuki’s bag, dinner for two, and, oh yes the breast pump, wake Yuki up, feed her and get her in the car. This routine worked pretty well until Yuki started waking up at 5:00 am. Why she chose to start doing that during tech week is beyond me. I was totally spent during the last week of rehearsal. On Thursday, she wouldn’t go down for a nap and I just about collapsed from stress and exhaustion. This was quickly remedied, however, by Philip giving me extra 1-1/2 hours of sleep on Friday morning. YAAAAY. The show turned out pretty well. At least I think it did. Who knows? I’m kind of delirious. But it was a good creative break from mommy-hood.

what was that thing about working with children and animals?

This brings me to …

The first team of baby sitters: I was able to look after Yuki for the days when my Musical Director was able to start rehearsal. But on the days that I had to start, I needed help. On the very first day, I had the bouncy seat set up in the house and I was ready to stage the opening number. I figured, “It’s only for an hour and a half until Philip gets here.” Then I had a mental freak out. As I entered the house with Yuki in my arms facing the 23 cast members, I thought to myself, “GAH! How am I going to do this?” Then I put her in the chair and began staging. Enter teen-age super baby sitter, Rhiannon. Rhiannon is a cast member, who is 16. She has been doing theatre since age 3 and I have directed her in half a dozen shows.

left to right; Beth (who is aces in her own right), Yuki, and Rhiannon

She has the maturity of 28 year old. She is playing the part of the Jester for this production. The jester is not in the opening number, so she was not actually called for rehearsal, but she showed up. Within minutes of me starting, she came to me and asked if she could go play with Yuki. I said yes, please. For the next hour and a half, she carried Yuki all around the theatre, fed her a bottle and entertained her. She saved my ass. I asked her on two other occasions to do the same thing. She did, happily. In one rehearsal, I looked over and there were easily five teen-agers surrounding Yuki. She is a lucky kid.

Then I hired Brendan. Brendan and his girlfriend Stina are our official nannies. They are both on my production team and they both have taught kids of various ages. When we were stressing about child-care, it occurred to me that I, in fact, work with people who like kids. I approached these two, who can’t be nicer and more nurturing and they said yes. Again, lucky us. So I asked Brendan to take Yuki at the theatre for an hour and a half until Philip got there. He is great. He and Yuki will have many fun days, I can tell.

Brendan promised to read Yuki The History of the Russian Revolution in its entirety, but with Lenin replaced by an adorable little duckling.

One afternoon, Philip got on the bus and was totally stuck in the baseball game traffic. He called at 5:45-the time he usually arrived at the theatre and said that he had gone only four blocks from his office. It happens that on that day, he was supposed to give Brendan a ride to a concert at UW, which isn’t far from our house. Philip was starting to worry that he wasn’t going to get to the theatre in time to give Brendan a ride. Then Brendan suggested he take my car and Yuki and go meet Philip. This was brilliant. I called Philip to let him know. He agreed that this was a very good idea. I then, packed up Yuki’s bag, put her in the car, gave Brendan the keys and sent them on their way. Then I had a series of about 10 heart attacks. I used to nanny for several different families. My duties often included driving the kids places. So I know that this is done, everyday. Brendan is also very trustworthy and capable. Then enters the TOTALLY irrational freak-out that they are going to somehow end up in the bottom of Lake Washington or get involved in multi car accident. I was on dinner break, eating my dinner distractedly picturing all these horrific scenes and finally confessed to Meggan that I was freaking out. 20 minutes later, Philip called to say that he had the vehicle and the child and all came into focus again. That was a big step.

A few nights later we went to see Young Frankenstein, the new Mel Brooks musical which is on its way to Broadway.

hmm ... wait a second ...

Ah. There it is.

Enter Brendan and Stina. They came, we left, we watched the show and laughed our heads off for nearly three hours. (As we were leaving, we saw Susan Stroman giving notes at the tech table. I asked Philip if I should give her my notes now, but he suggested no.) We came home to a peaceful sleeping child. Philip then took the sitters home and the evening was over. I must admit, I had my phone on vibrate, on my lap the whole night like a dork.

It is difficult to leave your child with someone other than your spouse. But you have to do it sometime. I figure, the sooner I get used to it the better. We want Yuki to be socialized and be well adjusted. We put her on the waiting list at a local Japanese daycare/preschool which probably won’t open up for a year so until then, we’ll have the Brendan/Stina team for just a couple days a week. It is a bit like leaving home for the first time, which in my case was at 15, but in reverse. It’s tough to do, but great things can come from it. I always thought my parents were brave to let me go then. I now know that they were insane. But if Yuki ever has an opportunity like the one I did, I’d let her go. I’ll just have many more heart attacks in the process.

Bonus: Cousins! My brother’s family came, as Philip mentioned. It was fun to have three girls here. The youngest, Ayana was particularly kind to Yuki, since she is dying to have a younger sister.

Yuki, Haruna, Taka, Yuhna, Ayana, and Ms. Dogface. Yuki has never looked less Japanese.

Trixie did enjoy the extra attention. We think.

Then came Matt. He is the eldest son of Philip's sister, Gibsey (or Gabrielle if you must use her grown-up name), who came to help us in May. He’s a good kid. He loved Yuki the same way Gibsey did, which was fun to see. There isn’t a single person, young or old in Philip’s family who is afraid of babies. Matt is no exception.

Yuki and Matt and Matt's square jaw.

Added Bonus: four-month check up! As the summer is coming to an end, Yuki had her 4-month check up. She weighs 14 pounds, 4 ounces and is 24 inches long. For you statistics fans, her weight is in the 65th percentile and her height is in the 75th. “Tall and lean” our doc said. Yup, she is my kid. Her head however is in the 95th percentile at 17 inches. Yup, she is Philip’s kid, too. She also had 4 shots and took them like a sailor. She let out a quick yelp and then was done. The "Strawberry Shortcake" Band-Aids were a nice touch.

Dramatization of Yuki's mood, post-inoculation

Extry-Added Bonus: TUBBY TIME!

Look at them toes!

And finally, I think Trixie speaks for all of us when she says,